Motivation

Right now I'm just writing a few things down to get myself motivated to exercise before I go to bed. Today was a really long day. Ayla has decided that sleeping 8 hours is not cool anymore, but waking up 2 or 3 times a night is the best thing ever. The other night I just didn't want to feed her at 1:30am, so I made her cry in the hopes that she would get herself back to sleep. Twenty minutes later she was still crying, and I just couldn't take it anymore - even with earplugs in. So I gave up and fed her....and she got up a few hours after that to eat again....big surprise. Last night she started crying at 11pm and let tell you, I was absolutely NOT feeding her after she had been asleep for just under 3 hours. I checked on her and rolled her back onto her tummy, covered her up, and she was out in less than 5 minutes. She is 4.5 months old now, and not even close to sleeping through the night anymore. She did soooo good for a while sleeping 7 or 8 hours at a time, but she won't sleep long anymore and I don't know why. I feel like she is old enough to be able to last 8 to 10 hours a night without eating and I don't know what to do. I had to train Gideon to sleep through the night, and I didn't get the guts to do that until he was 9 months old. I REALLY don't want to drag this sleeping at night thing out that long with Ayla....but I feel so....stuck.

After grocery shopping and getting Zenock from school today, my friend came over with her girls to babysit for us so we could go to the temple. I haven't been since the month before Ayla was born. Six months is a looooooong time to not go to the temple, especially since I am used to going every month. Poor Brady was feeling under the weather though, so after 15 minutes of proxy work he had to either be done or be sick. Although we were there only a short time, I am still very, very thankful we could go inside and do some work for those who have passed on. We helped people who were born in the 1700's and 1800's today. The officiator did a few of the ordinances in Spanish because he thought the people on the other side would appreciate it more if it was done in their native tongue...and those people were from Uraguay in the 1800's. It was a neat experience. Although I couldn't understand the words he said, the feeling was still the same. I love going to the temple because I always feel happy, whether it's my own happiness or the happiness of those beyond the veil I can't be sure.....but in the end I don't think it matters. What matters is being worthy to be inside the temple, and making the effort to attend.

After school got out the boys did homework and then soccer practice. Thankfully the weather is cooling off somewhat so it's not so unbearably hot for practice anymore. Gideon loves running around.....all the time. I got him to actually eat some food while we were there since practice is during his dinner time. He tripped and dropped the last chunk of his banana.....and he cried because it had dirt and rocks on it. This picture was taken after the banana casualty. I distracted him with a nutrigrain bar which he happily ate. Zenock wasn't using his shin guards so I put them on Gideon. He loves wearing those things.
And now that all 4 children are tucked in bed and my husband is off to work since no one could cover his shift for him, I am sitting on the couch wanting to do nothing but sit.....however, I can technically do that on my rowing machine as well....I just have to move my arms and legs and sweat and breathe hard.....but I am sitting. I do not enjoy exercising....but it seems that this baby weight isn't going to disappear by itself, and watching what I eat isn't helping much either. I have resigned that I have to exercise.....but the results I want aren't happening fast enough. It's only been a week since I started doing this, so my expectations shouldn't be high...but they are anyway.